Granny knew it was going to be a funny sort of day as she sat waiting in her car ready to go into college.The old gal was memorised by all the pigeons sitting on a empty building, then suddenly they all leaped off en-mass and flew in great big sweeping circles several times.
It was like a scene from old Alfie H's The Birds. They looked so sweet and innocent, then without warning, the little buggers dive bombed in front of anyone that was walking in front of the cenotaph.
Granny would be most grateful if someone could tell her why? (Kinky, you are a mind of useful information - whats the gen on this)?
Granny made her way into the college and was a bit early so she had to sit outside the classroom waiting for the 70's throwback to arrive.
Out of the corner of Granny's eye she could see a familiar sight making its way up the flight of stairs. The sight of Blondie puzzled Granny for a while because something was different. At first the old gal wasn't sure, he still had the same old strut and cocky walk as ever.
What could it be?
It was his golden locks - they were loose and flowing onto his shoulders, the little black ribbon was gone and his matted mane was in its full glory. But there was something else, it wasn't blond!
Granny can't be certain, but it looks as though he has put one of them rinses on it because now he is a ginger "knob" in every sense of the word!
I think the hair dye had nobbled Blondie cum Ginger Knobs brain as he didn't know his arse from his elbow today. His teaching methods (or should I say lack of them) were the worst that Granny has experienced.
He was flitting about from one subject to another like he had ants in his britches, talking of britches, he still had the dodgy stain on the front of his trousers! The jury is still out on that one!
Blondie's bitch wasn't on the scene today so not sure if that had some effect on "B" as he definitely wasn't on form.
Today, "B" lost one of his most ardent fan club members. This particular lady, Miss B C (aka Florence Nightingale - that's another story) has been struggling somewhat with the old farts methods and today this culminated into a very unpleasant spectacle.
She asked the old porn star to slow down a bit as she wasn't quite grasping the situation, but the old geezer turned on her and uttered several disparaging remarks in front of the whole class (this was not called for). We are all struggling, but she had been brave enough to voice her concerns, but ended up being pistol whipped for it.
The poor old soul burst into tears and left the classroom. The old bugger never even batted an eyelid but then went on to say to Florence's neighbour (gob on a stick) that it wasn't fair that she had to sit next to her. He's a two faced old ........ He is the most uncaring creature Granny has laid eyes on for sometime.
Its not nice seeing someone distressed like that and Florrie had really taken it to heart. I know she is struggling and Granny accepts that "B" does have a time-table to adhere to (an ill prepared one at that) but there are ways of talking to people and dealing with difficult situations. Blondie is definitely lacking in people skills.
Blondie has the distasteful habit of coming out with inappropriate comments. While we were concentrating on the work that he had set us, he suddenly spouted out to a couple of lads in the group, that he would like them to be at one of his gigs. He said that they would have the opportunity for sex and drugs, (I suppose the rock and roll would be "B"!) God forbid!
How the hell this bloke ever got to the position he is in today teaching young impressionable students is beyond Granny's comprehension! Thank god for sanctuary time, it was a most welcomed event and one Granny greeted with open arms.
After filling Granny's belly with kinky sausage, chips and peas, the old gal was ready to tackle the evening session.
Although Granny isn't keen on the whole AAT thing, she likes the evening session with a different tutor.
This particular person is so professional and well prepared and you leave the room at the end of the evening, actually believing that you have learnt and achieved something.
Blondie - take note!
